Little Woman 2

Ok so I'm going to try this again since I'm calmer since yesterday. I'm an intelligent, independent woman. I have feelings, ideas, opinions. Why is it that no one seems to hear me. I felt like I wasn't needed while looking at cars until someone had to write a check and truthfully if Hubs had the checkbook he could have done that too. We were looking to replace my car so you would think that what I thought would have been kinda important. It's like everyone thought that they knew better or had to handle it for me. My MIL just took over. It's not that I'm not appreciative for all the help, neither one of us has bought a car by ourselves so it was nice to have someone we trust to ask questions and offer advice. It just felt like I was a little kid again and waiting for mom to fix it for me, and Hubs just went along. That's probably what frustrated me the most.
Last night we borrowed a trailer from the in laws. I don't have a problem borrowing or sharing anything that we can with family. In fact I think it's great that in J's family they are so open with each other and offer to help with such ease. The borrowing was not the problem. It was really late when this was "decided", the tags are expired, we had to move stuff around at home in the middle of the night, we've never driven anything with a trailer hooked up. I just didn't think we should do it right then. I said that, they continued playing with it. I said specifically that I didn't want to take it home, nothing. We took it home. Hubs asked me if I was mad on the way home, you know how when someone asks you if you are mad it just makes you angrier. Yeah. Again I was just overlooked. J and his Mom decided we were taking it home it came home. It just hit a nerve.
I know that I have been weird for the last year or so, but I'm still me. I like to feel taken care of, I don't need it. I always share the big decisions with Jase, I may ask for advice from our parents but in the end its OUR decision.
My parents have made it perfectly clear that J is supposed to be the main provider and take care of me. It's old school Italian and the way I was raised. My Mom was raised the same way. She makes my Dads plate before she eats, the kitchen and laundry and cooking all my Mom's jobs. Their way of living isn't ours. J and I split everything pretty evenly at home. I thought that worked for both of us. Is that not working anymore or did he just get caught up in hurricane Momma. I know that we should talk, that I shouldn't let this just continue to bother me and expect Jase to figure it out. I don't talk well. It's hard for me to not always be the people pleaser. Maybe we will work some of this out this coming weekend, we're hoping to get out of town. We both need to blow off some steam.